Anger Issues and Blood Pressure

   

 

Quiet an odd title to give , but it seems that i have anger issues.

did i realise it today ? no. i think ive known about this for a while 

but is my anger justified ? kind off..at the very least from my point of view but i do feel bad about talking harsh and sternly once i do so. 

i once read in an article that people who tend to be very happy feel sad suddenly and they explained that it was because our emotions r so high that they can interchange 

consider it as there is a wavelength for happiness and sadness , the wavelengths for both might be almost same and hence can change from one to another in the speck of a minute. 

it seems the wavelngth of my anger and sadness seems to be close 

but why am i documenting my anger issues here ? , simply because i have run out of topics to discuss and because i felt like someone at some point of their life wouldve felt such anger . 

"anger flew through his veins ", a classic dialouge you can see in any book you read. i often used to wonder how does anger flow through someones veins and what the author meant. like definetly i understood it was a figure of speech and that he meant the person was very angry. but what would be the depth of that anger ?. i didnt get that part .

but these days when i get angry , mostly it is stemmed rom the same reason and moreover i have observed myself shaking as i speak with anger. and i finally get what the author meant by anger flew through his veins. because believe me , it does. 

sometimes when im angry i tend to leash out at my opponent. but keep in mind , the instances when i get angry are quite rare , but when i do it seems as though i might explode with that anger 

like even after i have stomped off to my room i find myself still feeling unstable and heavily breathing from all that pressure my veins went through to deliver blood while i was busy shouting 

it also seems that i blush when i do so. 

i often remind myself not to get angry uselessly , but at the same time cannot not stay queite when someone is going off limits with their words. 

these days my achan seems to have too much complaints about this very issue of mine. 

people feel like im disrespecting them when i try to raise my points. 

i know that speaking against older people is off limits. but there are some inherent things or matters which must be handled at all costs and the only way to do so is by raising out valid points on it . 

then there is amma who always does a shush whenever i am about to talk on some sensitive matter . 

she is like please shut up to avoid unnecessary fights. 

but i have never seen peace just because someone shut their mouths 

i believe if there is an issue it must be sorted out by talking and in extreme cases arguing, unless and until soemone learns of your perspective how would they realise if what they are doing is entierely right ot not. 

i know most of this seems like me trying to feed excuses into this blog on being angry 

i hope i would stop being shaky and all unstable when angry and get things sorted out in a calm manner.

oh boy ! lakshman from ramayan i feel for you !

lakshman from ramayan who was famous for his anger and savage replies and his devotion to his elder brother ram decided to leave anger on the advise on his older brother 

i still remmeber that part from ramayan which we had to study in class 10th or 9th , right now the meaning of those verses come to the back of my mind . 

ill try my best to not burst out . hopefully ill turn into a much more calmer human being 

for now im writing because i got angry and shaky and unstable and needed to release all that energy piled up .